What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg?

Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose.

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Wave Jokes More Wave Jokes

Why is the ocean so salty?

Because the land never waves back

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing! They just WAVED. SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Let MINNOW if you are not getting it. SHELL I continue?? No?.. I guess I'll stop WHALE I'm ahead. Thanks ladies and gentlefish

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What would be funny about Hillary as president?

That she would be sitting at the desk that Monica once kneeled under!

Who sits at the end of the yellow brick road surfing the Net?

The www.izard of Oz.

Nose Jokes More Nose Jokes

Why did the boy die when a car ran over his finger?

His finger was up his nose.

What do you call a nose without a body?

Nobody knows.

Ton Jokes More Ton Jokes

How much does wonton soup weigh?

One ton, but I don't know anyone that'd wantonly order it.

How much hate does it take to qualify as a "hater"?

I hate tons of stuff.

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to make money with a plus-size modeling agency?

Life insurance policies.

What's the best way to start an underwear presentation?

Start with a brief introduction.

Beg Jokes More Beg Jokes

What do you call someone who begs for a free copy of "Return Of The King"?

A free-LOTR

What's the difference between a paycheck and a pen*s?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck.

King Kong Jokes More King Kong Jokes

What's brown and furry on the inside and clear on the outside?

King Kong in clingfilm

Why is King Kong big and hairy?

So you can tell him apart from a gooseberry.