What they say: Want a bite of my sandwich?

What I hear: How much of this sandwich can you fit in your mouth

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?

He wanted to win the No Bell Prize.

Why do men, on average, die before women?

Because they want to.

Bite Jokes More Bite Jokes

What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark ?

Frost bite !

How do you find where a flea has bitten you ?

Start from scratch !

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?

Sorry if you've heard this) Christopher Walken

What kind of beast is it you hear?

A duck. ... with hiccups.

Sandwich Jokes More Sandwich Jokes

What is the difference between a robot and a sandwich?

Everything. These two objects have nothing in common.

When/why do feminists hate cannibals?

When they make sandwiches, because they're man-spreading.

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

What do you call a dwarf without a mouth?

Short for words.

What works better than anti-depressants?

A 12 Gauge in the mouth This came to me whilst being all depressed.

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

Why weren't there any black men in the trojan horse?

They couldn't fit.

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.