Where are the groceries?

ME: Bacon was on sale. WIFE: Oh god, what does that mean *sound of dump truck backing into driveway*

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

However, a man goes home and tells his wife about it. How is this possible?

He wasn't single.

What do my wife and a chest freezer have in common?

The exterior is hot, but its cold as ice inside.

Driveway Jokes More Driveway Jokes

What do you call a rainbow of Jeeps in the driveway?

Roy Jeep Biv

What does Drew Carey have in his driveway?

Cleveland Rocks!

Sound Jokes More Sound Jokes

When someone says "It is what it is," I reply, "Isn't it?

so we can both sound useless.

What does it sounds like when a Japanese Homer Simpson forgets how to count to 11?

Nin, ten, " ....I'll leave now.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

How did Bruce and Alfred build the Batcave all by themselves?

The Lord: I meant any questions about the mysteries of existence

Where were you born?

Me: Missouri. I: What state are you in now? M: Apathy. I: That's not what I meant. M: I don't care.

Grocery Jokes More Grocery Jokes

Where do farm animals get their groceries?

The pharmacy.

Where do dogs shop for groceries?

Wagmans.

Bacon Jokes More Bacon Jokes

Why did the pig walk into the kitchen?

Because he felt like bacon. :P

What did the bacon say to the sandwich?

This club can't even handle me right now

Sale Jokes More Sale Jokes

How do beer companies track their sales?

On dos axes

Where are the groceries?

ME: Bacon was on sale. WIFE: Oh god, what does that mean *sound of dump truck backing into driveway*