Where's my Spiderman costume?

I want to wear it to the science museum "In your closet, why " 9: DUH. To attract radioactive spiders!

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why should you be sure to pay your exorcist on time?

You wouldn't want to get repossessed!

What's the hurry?

Me: Nothing officer - Just didn't want to slow you down. Cop: I was pulling you over. Me: Well I get that. Now.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why don't mountains get cold?

They wear snow caps. *cringe* Courtesy of Westjet's horrible phone line.

What should you wear when drinking tea?

A tea-shirt.

9 Jokes More 9 Jokes

How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

10. 1 to change it and 9 to say they could have done it better.

What does a 9 volt battery, and a pretty girls bumhole have in common?

People tell you not to, but you're still going to put your tongue on it.

Closet Jokes More Closet Jokes

What do you call an armoire that is secretly used as a closet?

A closet closet.

Why didn't the homophobe decorate his house for Halloween?

Because his skeleton was in the closet

Attract Jokes More Attract Jokes

Why are TV's attracted to people?

Because we turn them on. / /

Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Spiderman Jokes More Spiderman Jokes

What is Spiderman's perfect job?

A web designer.

Why doesn't Spiderman like rice?

It reminds him of Uncle Ben.

Duh Jokes More Duh Jokes

Why are you rushin'?

Too which I replied "Because my grandpa is from Moscow." Duh..

Why did the girl bring 2 basketballs to the basketball game?

Because there was 2 basketball courts. DUH!