Attract Jokes

Why are TV's attracted to people?

Because we turn them on. / /

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How can you attract a group of like minded friends?

This clique bait will shock you!

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

Why was the monkey attracted to the paint?

Cuz it was yellow and appealing! Sorry if this is bad. Seen too many of the same jokes here and I wanted to add an original joke.

What do Canadian women put behind their ears to attract men?

Their ankles!

Why was Betty Boop never attracted to Mickey Mouse?

She's only attracted to colored guys.

Why do people buy smart cars?

Because opposites attract.

Why do people love their smartphones so much?

Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)

What's the best way to attract a pervert?

The NSFW tag, you freak

This joke may have profanity.

Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Why were the Persians attracted to the Anatolian Greeks?

Because they were Ionic.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

Why do men like smart women?

A. Opposites attract.

What attracted you to our company?

Well, I heard you pay money in exchange for work

Where's my Spiderman costume?

I want to wear it to the science museum "In your closet, why " 9: DUH. To attract radioactive spiders!

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

Why are all the ladies attracted to Voldemort?

Because of his hex appeal.

Why do all black people go to heaven?

The Son is attracted to black

How did the Royal Navy attract so many recruits?

They were impressive!

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Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why did the seismologist not have to pay for the damage caused by the earthquake?

It wasn't his fault.

Why Do Elephants Have Big Ears?

Because Noddy won't pay the ransom!

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

What's the difference between a pair of shoes and a ginger girl?

You try your best to keep your shoes from getting wet when you go to town.

How do you go about hiring a horse?

Try two pairs of stilts!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How did the Greek army separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar

How can a man go eight days without sleep?

No problem , He sleeps at night.

Cashier Jokes More Cashier Jokes

What did the cashier say after handing down a wad of currency to Dracula?

Count Dracula."

Why didn't the cashier get the punchline?

It didn't register.

Shock Jokes More Shock Jokes

Why do you wanna work at Clickbait Enterprises?

Here's 10 reasons why I should get the job "ok" Number 7 will shock you "You're hired"

What do you get if you cross a bottle of water with an electric eel?

A bit of a shock really!

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

Where did the little Japanese girl go when the little boy dropped by?

Everywhere.

Whats the worst part about dumping a Japanese girl?

Having to drop the bomb on them twice before they get it.

Canadian Jokes More Canadian Jokes

How do you find white Canadian reggae musician Snow in the snow?

You ask an informer

What's a Canadian's favorite footwear?

Aboot

Frenchman Jokes More Frenchman Jokes

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Philippe Philoppe.

What do you call a Frenchman that wears sandals?

Phillipe Floppe Courtesy, my Neuroscience Prof.