Which actress would you like to get stuck in an elevator with?

Me: One who knows how to fix elevators.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why did Spock dump his wife?

because William Shatner I know it's old, but I love it so

What did C.S. Lewis say about The Lord of the Rings books?

I don't know what you're Tolkien about!" Yeah, sorry.. I know it's dumb.

Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

What do you a white convict stuck between two black convicts?

An Oreo crookie

What do you call a pig stuck in a topiary?

A hedgehog.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What was Arnold Schwarzenegger's answer when asked which historical person he would like to play in a movie?

I'll be Bach.

What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who likes to smoke weed ?

A baked potato

Elevator Jokes More Elevator Jokes

Why did the elevator take antidepressants?

It was feeling down

What's red, round and goes up and down, up and down?

A tomato in an elevator

Fix Jokes More Fix Jokes

How many unemployed actors does it take to change a light bulb?

fixed) 100. 1 to change it and 99 to stand around and complain about how they coulda done a better job.

How does Bill Gates fix a broken lightbulb?

He buys a new house.

Actress Jokes More Actress Jokes

How did the actress from Legally Blonde die?

Witherknife

Why can't anyone stay angry long with an actress?

Because she always makes up.