Why are Republicans always so strung up about 9/11?

A: Elephants never forget.

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911 Jokes More 911 Jokes

What's your emer- She said don't get her anything for Valentine's Day! 911: And you didn't?

No! 911: Placing you in protective custody.

What's your emergency, sir?

Me: I'm being taken away by ducks! I'm being- 911: Please don't do this, sir M: AbDUCKted! 911: *hangs up*

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What do you do to an elephant with 3 balls?

Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

How do you fit an elephant into a Safeway bag?

You take the s out of safe and the f out of way!

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

What else did I forget?

WHERE IS MY BABY ! Wait, do I have one of those DO I HAVE A BABY !

How did the Burger King get the Dairy Queen pregnant?

He forgot to wrap his whopper.

Republican Jokes More Republican Jokes

Why do Republicans make good DJs?

Because they know how to shut the House down.

How do you pump a Republican for information?

With a plunger.

String Jokes More String Jokes

What's more fun than swinging a dead baby by a string?

Stopping it with a shovel!

What do a Marionette User and Tampon Thief have in common?

They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)