Why are there no pictures of Ted Cruz holding a baby?

They always turn out blurry from him shaking them.

Previous Random Joke Next

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How 'bout this one?

Salesman: Sir, we've been over this, I don't know how many McNuggets it will hold.

How do you hold a pirate rabbit?

With its buccaneers!

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What do you get if you turn an evil laugh backwards?

A laughing cow. Ahahahahahahahamoo.

How do we get in?

Obi-Wan: We'll be stealthy. *turns on huge, glowing laser sword*

Picture Jokes More Picture Jokes

Why do Japanese people look so serious in pictures?

Last time they saw a flash it destroyed their country

Whats the best thing on the menu?

Waiter: The cheesebur- Me: WRONG! *points to the picture I drew on it of Ironman fighting Darth Vader*

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What did the sperm say to the egg?

Nice to meet you. Wanna make a baby?

Why don't Blacks and Mexicans have babies?

Their kids would be too lazy to steal.

Shake Jokes More Shake Jokes

What have you tried so far?

Me: Everything IT guy: Me: I shook the mouse a few times and did some swearing

Why was the deaf man sighing and shaking his head in disgust when he looked over at his next door neighbour?

Because she was *airing her dirty laundry*!!!

Ted Cruz Jokes More Ted Cruz Jokes

What's the difference between the Devil and Ted Cruz?

The Devil has standards.

What do you call a foreign born communist running for President?

Ted Cruz