Why can't we edit tweets?

Because if we could I would edit a tweet with 2,000 retweets to say "RT if you hate puppies and babies."

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Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?

A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

What's the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy?

A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining. Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why do feminists hate Apple?

Because they're not PC.

Why do jihadists drink instant coffee?

Because they hate the french press...

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What's easier to load into a garbage truck? Bowling balls or babies?

Babies, because you can use a pitchfork.

What do you get when you drop a baby into a wood chipper?

Well an erection of course.

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

Why shouldn't you laugh when a black man falls off his bike?

It could be your bike. EDIT: Spelling.

What did E.T.'s mother say when E.T. got home?

Where on Earth have you been??!!" **Thank you, I'll be here all night... Edit: Thanks for da love Dr. Jones!

2000 Jokes More 2000 Jokes

Why can't we edit tweets?

Because if we could I would edit a tweet with 2,000 retweets to say "RT if you hate puppies and babies."

Why didnt Craig buy Anne Franks shoes on Ebay for 2000$ ?

They were Holo-costly

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

What do you think of my tweets?

Wife: They're all pretty terrible. Me: Don't you have ANYTHING positive to say Wife: You're consistent.

Why did the boy carry a clock and a bird on Halloween ?

It was for 'tick or tweet' !