2000 Jokes

What do you call 2000 mockingbirds?

Two kilomockingbirds (credit goes to my old physics book)

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Why didnt Craig buy Anne Franks shoes on Ebay for 2000$ ?

They were Holo-costly

What does modern horror films and the 2000 presidential election have in common?

It's Al Gore

Why has Stonehenge been there since 2000 BC?

because it's stoned.

How do you move a 2000 lb dinosaur?

Don't know?? Use DINO-MITE

Why did the Mexican army attack the Alamo with only 2000 soldiers?

they only had one pickup

How does Microsoft count to 10?

1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.

Why are Vampires Democrats?

They want Gore in 2000.

What has 2000 eyes and 4000 feet?

A thousand dogs.

Why can't we edit tweets?

Because if we could I would edit a tweet with 2,000 retweets to say "RT if you hate puppies and babies."

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Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What do Saudi guys and girls have in common?

They all get stoned constantly.

Why do people call their weed the Koran?

Because if your burn it, it gets you stoned

Craig Jokes More Craig Jokes

Why didnt Craig buy Anne Franks shoes on Ebay for 2000$ ?

They were Holo-costly

Who's there ! Craig ! Craig who ?

Craig in the wall !

Ebay Jokes More Ebay Jokes

How many livers do people have?

I want to make sure I have a backup before I put this thing on Ebay.

Where can you buy a 3 headed flying purple camel with 74 noses?

Ebay.

Mexican Army Jokes More Mexican Army Jokes

Why did the Mexican army attack the Alamo with only 2000 soldiers?

they only had one pickup

What's the motto of the Mexican army?

An Army of Juan

Bottle Jokes More Bottle Jokes

How does a virgin pop her cherry?

by using a bottle opener

What's worse than finding Astroglide on your Mom's shopping list?

Finding an empty bottle in the trash.

Dino Mite Jokes More Dino Mite Jokes

What Do You Call An Arab Dinosaur?

Dino-mite.

What do you get when you put a bomb and a dinosaur together?

A: Dino-mite.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the duck leave the dancefloor?

He didn't want to get down on it.

How Do Priests Get High?

Snorting the left over ashes from Ash Wednesday...

Stonehenge Jokes More Stonehenge Jokes

What kind of music do they play at Stonehenge?

Hard Rock.

Why has Stonehenge been there since 2000 BC?

because it's stoned.