Why did Mary Magdalene have an affair with Jesus?

She heard about his second coming

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Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why couldn't Jesus waterski?

Because he never existed.

What was the first mention of soccer in the bible?

When Jesus went up for the cross.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

What do you call it when you second guess your decision to book a stay at a Native American resort?

A reservation reservation reservation. Credit to Brian Regan, this is my favorite joke of his!

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What's the last thing you want to hear while using a urinal?

nice watch"

What's a moo hoo for the sound you hear when a cow spits?

A cud thud!

Second Come Jokes More Second Come Jokes

What happens when you get more than you payed for with a Mexican Gigolo?

The second coming of Jess.

Why did Mary Magdalene have an affair with Jesus?

She heard about his second coming

Affair Jokes More Affair Jokes

Why couldn't the guy with insomnia have an affair with anyone's wife?

Because he couldn't sleep with anyone.

What do they call an affair with a psychiatrist?

A psychiatric tryst.