Why did the man tear a page out of the calendar?

He wanted to take a month off.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What are the four words that you least want to hear, after having blown Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson."

Why did the man open a rooftop bar?

He wanted to have drinks on the house.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the English man say when he walked in on his wife making love to three men?

Ello, 'ello, 'ello!

What do you call a man who can't stand?

Neal

Tear Jokes More Tear Jokes

How does it feel to have your head separated from your body?

It tears your apart.

Why is fruit so expensive?

I want some raspberries, not the tears of Jesus.

Month Jokes More Month Jokes

What did the doctor say to the cancer patient?

You have tumor months to live.

What does December have that other months dont have?

The letter D.

Page Jokes More Page Jokes

Where is the best place to hide a body?

Buried in the third page of google search results.

Where's England, Jon?

He proudly answers: - Page 83.

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

What did the Calendar say to the Wall-clock the moment it became June 1st?

I am dismayed!"

Why was the calendar depressed?

His days were numbered.