Why did the mathematician get an F on his English quiz?

He wrote, "i is the square root of negative 1."

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What is WRONG with you?

Me: *slowly counting on fingers* let's see... ok... carry the 1... um... That would be everything

How many cancer patients does it take to change a light bulb?

1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was

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Why do mathematicians think that spring is summer?

It's not their fault. May tricks them.

What is the type of conference that brings together knights and mathematicians?

A

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Why did the mathematician get an F on his English quiz?

He wrote, "i is the square root of negative 1."

How do you get an elephant in to a plastic bag?

First you take the 'T' out of 'Tesco', what do you get Esco. Then you take the 'F' out of 'Weigh', what do you get

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What do you call a dinosaur with an English degree?

Thesaurus.

What does a cab driver have in common with a pool cue ball?

The harder you hit them, the more english you get out.

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How many zeros in one million?

Six" "Ok, thanks" *writes milli000000n*

Whatcha got, reddit?

I am not funny and I need to be. I am writing a script for a short show that's formatted like "Weekend Update" on Saturday Night Live. So that means one sentence about the topic, and then one liner joke. Thank you all!

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Why did the mathematician get an F on his English quiz?

He wrote, "i is the square root of negative 1."

What's the square root of optimus prime?

I'm not sure, but it's more than meets the eye.