Why do I always sit in the back of an airplane?

Cos iv never heard of an airplane reverse into a mountain... ill help myself out...

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Airplane Jokes More Airplane Jokes

Who should you pray to if you don't want the airplane that you are on to get diverted?

Diversion Mary

What do you call a model flying an airplane full of animals?

Zoolander

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What do you do if a girl sits on your hand?

Try to get her off!

What do you call an Irishman sitting on your front porch?

Paddy O'Furniture

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Why did eighteen blondes go to the movies together?

A: They heard that under seventeen weren't admitted!

What's a schizophrenic's favorite Christmas song?

Do You Hear what I Hear?

Mountain Jokes More Mountain Jokes

What is green and glides down a mountain?

A skiwi

Why don't mountains get cold?

They wear snow caps. *cringe* Courtesy of Westjet's horrible phone line.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What TV personality lives in your phone?

SIM Card-ashian! (it might help if you say it out loud)

What did the dolphin say when three orcas swam by?

Whale, whale, whale, who do we have here? Please, this is a cry for help.

Iv Jokes More Iv Jokes

Why do I always sit in the back of an airplane?

Cos iv never heard of an airplane reverse into a mountain... ill help myself out...

How are you doing this morning?

Me: *finishing hanging bag of coffee upside down like an IV and tying my arm off* Fine, you