Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why didn't the little girl want to leave nursery school?

A: She wanted to be a nurse.

What do Justin Bieber and Pinocchio have in common?

Both want to be real boys

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why don't cats play poker in the jungle?

Too many cheetahs.

How do you get a Criminal to stop running?

Play the national anthem

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

How many countries does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Five. Germany to start it, France to try and then give up almost immediately, Italy to start, give up, and try again from the other side, America to finish it and claim credit for the whole thing, and Switzerland to sit in the dark and pretend that nothing happened.

Why'd the dog sit in the shade?

He didn't want to be a hot dog!

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

Why was Cinderella bad at basketball?

Because her coach was always a pumpkin.

Why couldn't Cinderella play football very well?

Her coach was a pumpkin

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What's the difference between a vampire with toothache and a rainstorm?

One roars with pain and the other pours with rain.

What should you do if a vampire borrows your comic?

Wait for him to give it back.

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

How do you sort out Ant and Dec?

Squash one and deal with the other later.

What was the pumpkin’s favorite sport?

Squash.