Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why do you want to work in a bank Alan?

Fred: 'Cuz there's money in it sir.

Why did the suicidal man cross the road?

Because he wanted to play chicken.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What position do u play?

ME: I'm a *thinks back to the only game I watched* wide-retriever.

Why don't they play poker in the jungle?

Too many cheetahs.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What's up ?

Boy: If I tell you, will you sit on it

What's Irish and sits out all night?

Patio furniture.

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

Why couldn't Cinderella play football very well?

Her coach was a pumpkin

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What does a vampire call a hemophiliac?

Diarrhea.

What should you do if a vampire borrows your comic?

Wait for him to give it back.

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

What game do monsters play with humans?

Squash.

What do you get when you squash a bungalow?

A flat!