Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team?

Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet?

Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!

Why do men want to marry a virgin?

To avoid criticism and comparison.

War Jokes More War Jokes

Which war had the most overweight soldiers?

VietNOMNOMNOM

How do zombies communicate in times of war?

Cryptic code.

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

What happened when a frog joined the cricket team ?

He bowled long hops !

What did the worm want to do when he grew up?

He wanted to join the Apple Core (Corps).

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

How are a grenade and a wife similar?

If you pull the ring off it, the house is gone

How's the meal?

Me: I dunno. Let me check *pulls out phone Me: Not good. It only got 2 likes on Instagram Waiter: ...

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

What did they do at the Boston Tea Party ?

I don't know I wasn't invited !

Why did vatican invite Bernie not Hillary?

They couldn't afford it.

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What do you call a pig that's a lumber jack?

Well you call him porkchop

What soft drink do pigs like best?

Root beer.