Baghdad Jokes

What did the Iraqi boy say when his dad forgot his rucksack?

Baghdad!

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What is the process for a terrorist kidnapping?

Well, first Demascus, then they Baghdad!

What do you call a dad that works at a grocery store?

Baghdad

What did they say about Baghdad after they installed too many garbage cans?

It was Bin Laden

What do you call a spider from Baghdad?

An Iraqnid.

What do Baghdad and Hiroshima have in common ?

A. Nothing yet.

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A. Jokes More A. Jokes

What do accountants use for birth-control?

A. Their personalities.

Why was Goliath so surprised when David hit him with a slingshot?

A. The thought had never entered his head before.

Behave Jokes More Behave Jokes

What did did the mother duck say to her duckling?

A: "If you don't behave, I'm gonna quack you one."

Where do you put a badly behaved spaceman?

On the astronaughty step.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What do my dad and Carly Rae Jepsen have in common?

They both said they were just going to the store

Why do you smell like weed?

Me: How do you know what weed smells like ! Busted, mister! You're grounded for a week. Dad: Okaayy :(

Iraq Jokes More Iraq Jokes

What do they call a dog in Iraq?

A Shia pet. *friend of mine came up with this and was pretty proud of himself

Why was Gollum executed at a bar in Iraq?

Because he asked for Ice-es

Rucksack Jokes More Rucksack Jokes

What do you call man with.. What do you call man with a rucksack on his back and salt and pepper on his head?

A seasoned traveller.

What did the Iraqi boy say when his dad forgot his rucksack?

Baghdad!

Grocery Store Jokes More Grocery Store Jokes

What's your favorite song?

Me, to a baby wearing a Metallica shirt at the grocery store.

What's the difference between the grocery store and a math book?

In a math book I can buy 57 papayas at $1.99 each and no one will care.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What's your favourite animal joke?

I give tours at a zoo. Each tour goes for a couple of hours so it is good to engage the guests and make the tour a bit more fun. What is your favourite animal joke I can use at work?

Want to hear a joke about construction?

Nah, I'm still working on it.

Bin Laden Jokes More Bin Laden Jokes

What do Anne Frank and Bin Laden have in common?

They're both hide and seek champions!

What did they say about Baghdad after they installed too many garbage cans?

It was Bin Laden