Iraq Jokes

Why are there no Walmarts in Iraq?

Because they are all Targets.

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How did I escape Iraq?

Iran

Where did Saddam Hussein keep all of his CDs?

In Iraq.

Why was the guy from 127 Hours arrested for espionage?

He was proven guilty of providing arms to Iraq

How do you get from Iran to Iraq without moving?

You switch the 'n' with 'q'.

Why are Saudi Arabians so clueless?

They're all living under Iraq

What did the Middle Eastern dishwasher say when his boss asked him what he did all day at work?

Iraq the dishes in the dish rack and Iran the dishwasher

Why does Iraq have no Walmarts?

Because there's a Target on every corner.

What does Iraq and Bristol Palin have in common?

Both of them are hard to pull out of.

Why did Walmart go out of business in Iraq?

Because there are too many targets.

Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan?

Because there are already too many targets. (credit: some old veteran bum looking guy sleeping on a bench at the police station I went to today.)

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What do they call a dog in Iraq?

A Shia pet. *friend of mine came up with this and was pretty proud of himself

Where did Sadam Hussein keep his CD collection?

In Iraq.

How do the people of northern Iraq manage to get so much done?

The Kurds have their ways

What do you call a person of mixed heritage from eastern Turkey/northern Iraq, and from Wisconsin?

A Cheese Kurd.

Why was Aron Ralston arrested by the FBI?

For giving arms to Iraq.

Where does Saddam Hussein keep his plates?

In Iraq.

What's Iraq's favourite sitcom?

Men behaving Baghdadly.

How did he get from Afghanistan to Iraq?

Iran (He ran). Thought of this when looking at the world map, sorry that it's terrible.

Why are the people of Saudi Arabia always behind the times?

Because they live under Iraq.

Why is there so much tension in Iraq?

They Haven't Broke the Isis yet.

Why was Gollum executed at a bar in Iraq?

Because he asked for Ice-es

How did you get out of Iraq?

He answered: "Iran"

Why are Saudis so behind on current events?

Because they live under Iraq.

What do Bristol Palin and Iraq have in common?

It's just so hard to pull out.

What's the national bird of Iraq?

The drone.

What do you call sandpaper in Iraq?

A map.

What's harder to pull out of than Iraq?

Bristol Palin.

What is Iraq's national bird?

A: Duck.

What's Hillary's thoughts about her campaign?

Iran, Iraq, I lost

Who busted you out of Iraq?

Well actually, I-ran

Why do Arabs only buy Chevy Trucks?

Because they're like Iraq.

What should Iraq get for its air defense system?

A:A refund.

Why isn't there a Wal-Mart in Iraq?

because there is a target in every corner.

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Iran Jokes More Iran Jokes

Why is Iran called Iran?

Because when I saw the bombs, I*ran*

What did you do in Iran?

I ran.

Afghanistan Jokes More Afghanistan Jokes

How did I get out of Afghanistan?

Iran.

What do Congressional Republicans and ISIS in Afghanistan have in common?

Their first act since arriving was to go after the elderly.

Q Jokes More Q Jokes

Why couldn't R get to P?

He had to wait in a Q!

What's a Michigander?

A: An Ohioan who can read. Q: What's an Ohioan? A: A Kentuckian who can count. Q: What's a Kentuckian? A: A West Virginian with a branching family tree. Q: And who the hell are you to be making all these rude judgments? A: Trauma counselor for tour guides.

Boss Jokes More Boss Jokes

Why was my boss surprised to see me screwing with the IT guy?

They said IT couldn't be done

Where were you on Friday?

Me: It was a holiday. Boss: HALLOWEEN IS NOT A PAID HOLIDAY! Me: It is if you go as Christmas. Boss:...

Target Jokes More Target Jokes

Why wont ISIS bomb my local Walmart?

because its not a Target.

Why can't a storm trooper get a girl pregnant?

Because they always miss their target!

' Jokes More ' Jokes

Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?

The food is great, but there’s just no atmosphere.

How do you know if a flock of geese is from Canada?

They fly in an 'A' (eh)

Espionage Jokes More Espionage Jokes

How do you combat espionage?

Umbreonage

Why was the guy from 127 Hours arrested for espionage?

He was proven guilty of providing arms to Iraq

Dish Jokes More Dish Jokes

What's a dish best served cold?

Air condish.

How many honest intelligent caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?

Both of them.