Dish Jokes

Where did L Ron Hubbard store his dishes?

In the L Ron cupboard.

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What did the Middle Eastern dishwasher say when his boss asked him what he did all day at work?

Iraq the dishes in the dish rack and Iran the dishwasher

Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who?

Dishes Sean Connery.

What do you call a man doing dishes?

Single.

What do you get when you mix an octopus and a Mexican?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

What's the first thing a woman does after leaving spousal abuse therapy?

The dishes, if she knows what's good for her!

What's a dish best served cold?

Air condish.

What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

What's the best part about buying dishes that are made in Mexico?

They wash themselves.

How does the redneck help his wife with the dishes?

He gets her Dawn.

What do you suppose Ray Rice's fiance' did when he got her home from knocking her out?

The dishes if she knows what's good for her!

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How can you tell if your wife left you?

You get laid the same amount of times but the dishes start to pile up. Hey now!

What do you call a "to-go" dish ordered from German-Italian restaurant?

Alfredosehen

What is the first thing a woman should do when she gets out of the Battered Women's Shelter?

The dishes, if she knows what's good for her.

What was the rock band doing at the kitchen sink?

Moshing the dishes

How many honest intelligent caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?

Both of them.

Why is revenge a dish best served cold?

Because it's just-ice

Why do petri dishes make good conversationalists?

They're cultured.

What kind of dish does LeBron like?

anything with curry in it.

Where did the drug addict keep his food and dishes?

The potry

What's a terrible plate pun?

dish one.

Why did Helen Keller stop cleaning her dishes?

She was running out of things to read.

Whats the first thing a woman does when she gets to the battered shelter?

The dishes if she knows whats good for her.

Why is revenge a dish best served with honey?

Because honey is what you find at the end of bee trails (betrayals)

What do you need to have to do the dishes when you don't want to?

Dishcipline This is literally a joke I told in a dream and I remembered it when waking up.

What side dish do frogs like to enjoy with their hamburgers?

French Flies!

Why did God invent women?

You think he's gonna wash the dishes

How Does Sean Connery Wash His Dishes?

Like a Bosch!

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Middle Eastern Jokes More Middle Eastern Jokes

What do you call a Middle Eastern moving company?

Pack-it-stan

Why don't Middle Eastern dogs bite as often?

Because they Muslim.

White People Jokes More White People Jokes

What's something white people can call other white people but black people can't call other black people?

Dad.

Why do white people not like playing uno with mexicans?

They take all the green cards

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What is the difference between joghurt and America?

If you leave joghurt alone for 200 years, it will grow a culture!

Why is Islam called the religion of peace?

After you leave the religion, you rest in peace.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the only thing worse than a bagpiper?

A: Good question. We're still trying to find out too.

What is the first thing a blind man says?

My eyes! My eyes!

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What's a dentists favorite time of day?

Tooth-Hurty

Why can't you trust girls?

because you can't trust something that bleeds for days and doesn't die.

Iraq Jokes More Iraq Jokes

How did I escape Iraq?

Iran

What do Bristol Palin and Iraq have in common?

It's just so hard to pull out.

Puerto Rican Jokes More Puerto Rican Jokes

Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature?

Because the spray paint can wasn't invented until 1949.

What is the Puerto Rican national anthem?

Row row row your boat

Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why did the guitarist get life in prison?

He fingered a minor.

Why are men afraid of the world?

They spend 9 months trying to get out of a woman and the rest of their life trying to get back in.