Blonde Count Jokes

How does a blonde count a thousand sheep?

She counts the legs, and divides by 4.

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Why can't a blonde count to 70?

Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Mic Jagger and a Scotsman?

Mic Jagger says "Hey you, get off of my cloud". A Scotsman says "Hey, McLeod! Get off of my ewe!"

What's the difference between Voldemort and Tyrion Lannister?

One had a horcrux, the other had a whorecrush..

4 Jokes More 4 Jokes

How many Saiyans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one... But it takes 4 episodes and Krillin dies...

When does a Pentagon have only 4 sides?

When it is intercepted by a plane.

Escalator Jokes More Escalator Jokes

What did the escalator say to the elevator?

Nothing, he just staired.

What did the elevator say to the stairs?

Never mind, I'll escalator

Blonde Jokes More Blonde Jokes

Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?

Toes go in first!

How do you drown a blonde in a submarine?

A: Knock on the door.

Year Jokes More Year Jokes

What's white and Irish and sits in your backyard all year?

Paddy O'Furniture

What do you get when you mix the Twelve Days of Christmas with Ninety-nine Bottles of beer on the wall?

A year in prison if there's any justice.

Blonde Busy Jokes More Blonde Busy Jokes

How do you keep a blonde busy for years?

Tell her to count the stairs on an escalator.

How do you keep a blonde busy?

Write "Please turn over" on both sides of a page and hand it to her.

Divide Jokes More Divide Jokes

Why was 7 arrested for homicide?

Because somebody divided 14 into 2 and he was the prime suspect

How do a neckbeard's cells divide?

by m'tosis

Stair Jokes More Stair Jokes

What do you call an snobbish criminal walking down the stairs?

A condescending con descending.

What's the difference between a cloths hanger and a flight of stairs?

The cloths hanger only solves one problem.