Da Jokes

What's an argument in the Middle East but a compliment in the U.S.A?

You da bomb" "No, you da bomb!"

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What does DMX say when he has trouble putting on a hoodie?

WHERE DA HOOD WHERE DA HOOD WHERE DA HOOD AT?

Where r my legal briefs?

Paralegal *hands him his boxers* Judge: lol Jury: We're hung Judge: ha! DA: Balls in your court Judge: DO MORE!

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

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Movie Jokes More Movie Jokes

What did Christian Grey say when he read reviews of his movie?

People did not like my movie. I guess I am 50 shades of letdown... But I can sure GET UP"!

What's the best part of a movie?

The climax.

Artist Jokes More Artist Jokes

What do you call an artist in a dark alley?

Sketchy

Why will the artist formerly know as Prince only hire former FBI agents as his house maids?

Because they must be able to "dust for Prince" I'll see myself out now

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you call an alligator that wins a race?

A chompion. (7-year old me thought he was very clever.)

What do the LGBT community and computers have in common?

Most people over 50 are scared of them and think they are destroying the fabric of society!

Middle East Jokes More Middle East Jokes

What phrase is a compliment in America, but an argument in the Middle East?

No, YOU the bomb.

Where's a good place to get Italian food in the middle east?

Allah Garden.

Khakis Jokes More Khakis Jokes

Why was the New Englander so intent on looking for his khakis?

Cuz he needed to pahk da cah in da yahd.

What kind of khakis do birds wear?

Khakaws!

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why did the global warming activist compliment the earth?

Cause it looked hotter than usual! (I'll see myself out)

Why is it not a good idea to tell your parents about your failures while they are on an elevator?

It would cause them to be disappointed on many different levels.

Willem Dafoe Jokes More Willem Dafoe Jokes

Who's the opposite of Willem Dafoe?

Willem DaFriend.

Why does Willem Dafoe play a villain in a lot of movies?

Duh. Cause he's da foe.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What did the author of The Lord Of The Rings say after he completed his books?

If you like dialogue, theres a whole lot of Tolkein.

How do you know Bono is selfish?

He does a lot of Pro-Bono work.