Middle East Jokes

I originally thought that the black rock gets wet, but it was brought to my attention that the Red Sea is in the middle east, so it prob'ly starts a holy war!

What do you call innocent women and children dying in the middle east?

Freedom

Why aren't there any Walmarts in the middle east?

Because there's Targets around every corner.

Why can't there be peace in the Middle East?

It IS what it IS.

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

What do you call a witness to an event in the Middle East?

A Dubaistander. Yeah I thought of it myself.

What do you call a research facility in the middle east?

Darpa Darpa

Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East?

Iran so far away

What do they call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids

What do you call spiders in the Middle East?

Iraqnids. Yep. An original.

Why do people regard the middle east as the holy land?

Because they're constantly drilling for oil.

Why are there no Wal-Marts in the middle east?

A: Because there are too many Targets

What's the most disappointing country in the Middle East?

Oman

What's the most dangerous bar to go to in the middle east?

The allahu ak-bar

Whats Kim Kardashian and the Middle East got in common?

Both are covered in oil, huge, and been invaded by the West.

When was pasta introduced to the Middle East?

when someone fed a genie alfredo

What phrase is a compliment in America, but an argument in the Middle East?

No, YOU the bomb.

Why can't there ever be peace in the Middle East?

We can't even get FIVE DENTISTS to agree on a toothpaste. That's why.

What do you call Call Of Duty in the middle east ?

Tuesday

Why is the middle east the best place to open a store at the moment?

Because business is booming.

What do they call Counter-Strike in the Middle East?

Tuesday.

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Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

What happened when the Italian chef died?

He pasta away

Why don't they let Italians swim in Long Island Sound?

If you know that one, try this one: Why do seagulls fly to the dump

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why do Italian men wear gold chains?

So they know where to stop shaving.

How do I know you're not John Cena?

I can see you

Language Jokes More Language Jokes

What jokes do you know that can only be understood if you know two (or more) languages?

Like a joke that involves a pun on a word that has different meanings in different languages. Please tell us what languages they are in.

What language do bill boards use?

Sign language.

Corner Jokes More Corner Jokes

What's big, green and cries in the corner?

The Incredible Sulk

Why aren't there any walmarts in Afghanistan?

Why aren't there any walmarts in Afghanistan? Because there's a Target on every corner!

Lamb Jokes More Lamb Jokes

What do you call a rebellious teenager whose parents are a lamb and a moose?

A radical mooselamb

Why do lambs go to casinos?

They love to gambol.

Pimp Jokes More Pimp Jokes

How could the pimp always easily locate his ho?

Because, she really stands out on the street.

How is being a pimp like being a farmer?

You get some hoes and they get dough for you.

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

What airline allows you to pee in cruise?

Wizz Air

How do you get a polar bear in the water?

First, you cut a hole in the ice, then you sprinkle some pees around the hole. When the polar bear goes to take a pee, you kick him in the ice hole!

Pea Jokes More Pea Jokes

What's the most polite meal?

Peas and franks.

What did the pea say to the peanut?

At least you got one nut, I don't see what you're crying about.