Gollum Jokes

What is Gollum's favourite bird?

A Smeagull! :D

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What does Gollum think about Gandalf's smoking addiction?

Stupid, filthy habitses!

Why was Gollum executed at a bar in Iraq?

Because he asked for Ice-es

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Gandalf Jokes More Gandalf Jokes

Why does Gandalf never dress as a pimp for halloween?

Because he doesn't want to be taken as a conjurer of cheap tricks.

What did Gandalf say when he tried to shut down Auschwitz?

You shall not gas!"

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do John Mellencamp and Ashton Kutcher have in common?

They both picked up a Cougar and then thought better of it.

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

Iraq Jokes More Iraq Jokes

What do they call a dog in Iraq?

A Shia pet. *friend of mine came up with this and was pretty proud of himself

What is Iraq's national bird?

A: Duck.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did Mike Tyson ask the really tired Norse god?

Are you Thor

When do accountants laugh out loud?

When somebody asks for a raise

Scallop Jokes More Scallop Jokes

What's Gollum's favourite food?

Scallops, scallops!

How does a sea horse run?

Scallops!

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What did the man say when he walked into a bar?

Ouch!"

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight. :D

Execute Jokes More Execute Jokes

Why was Gollum executed at a bar in Iraq?

Because he asked for Ice-es

Why did the servant of the Airplane King get executed?

He was not Boeing.