Patrick Jokes

Why did Patrick's girlfriend have to go to the doctor?

She had a weast infection.

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What's the difference between mlk day and st. Patrick's day?

Everyone WANTS to be irish on st Patrick's day.

Why is Patrick so dumb?

He's living under a rock.

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Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What song to snakes like to sing ?

Viva Aspana !

What do snakes use to build clocks?

Metal Gears

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley?

A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.

What would Caitlyn Jenner need to do if she changed her mind about being a woman?

She would need to reJennerate some balls. What does Caitlyn Jenner do before she goes out Bruce's up for the evening.

Everybody Jokes More Everybody Jokes

What did the eggs say when the cops showed up?

Everybody scramble!

Where is everybody?

Everybody I don't know. All over the planet I guess.

Cinco De Mayo Jokes More Cinco De Mayo Jokes

What's honey mustards least favorite holiday?

Cinco de Mayo

What's the only major difference between Cinco de Mayo and Saint Patrick's day?

Nobody wants to pretend to be a Mexican for a day.

Christopher Columbus Jokes More Christopher Columbus Jokes

How did Christopher Columbus 'discover' America?

By occident

What is the difference between St. Patrick and Christopher Columbus?

One drove all the snakes from Ireland, the other drove away all of the Native Americans.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day Jokes More Martin Luther King Jr. Day Jokes

What's the difference between Martin Luther King Jr. Day and St. Patricks Day?

Everyone want to be Irish on St. Patricks Day.

Why do we have Martin Luther King Jr. Day off?

So the black people will not be the only ones skipping school.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What's Irish and sits outside?

Paddy O'furniture

How is food purchased an an Irish grocery?

You buy it per-tater

Lad Jokes More Lad Jokes

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."

What did Saint Patrick say as he drove the snakes out of Ireland?

Are ye alright in the back there lads?