How did Paul, the octopus, originally die?

Torres went and asked Paul proudly, "How many goals will I end up with after thia this World Cup " Paul died laughing.

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Laugh Jokes More Laugh Jokes

What's the difference between a tribal tattoo and /r/jokes?

A tribal tattoo makes you laugh.

How was school?

4: Trenton said his dad likes to go outside and fight lions - laughs - oh honey - nobody would name their kid Trenton

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When you ask her "Have you ever read Shakespeare?

And she answers "No, who wrote it " .... Keep moving.

What does the scientist say when asked if Invisibility Cloak will be applicated by the military?

Yes, but you won't see it any time soon.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

What do you call a vegetable/fruit that dies for it's religion?

A Tomartyr

End Jokes More End Jokes

Why shouldn't you ask Jon Snow what time it is?

Because his watch has ended.

When I have complicated problems I always ask myself, what would my imaginary wife do?

And then I end up buying myself cupcakes, and shoes.

Octopus Jokes More Octopus Jokes

What do you call an octopus that loves jokes?

A knock-knocktopus.

What animal do I respect most?

The octopus. I have no idea what to do with my hands most of the time, and I only have two of them.

Paul Jokes More Paul Jokes

What did everyone think?

STEVE: PAUL: JANE: SARAH: MARK: DAVE:

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply?

Paul gas coin!

Goal Jokes More Goal Jokes

How many goals did Germany score?

A brazillian

Which insect didn't play well in goal ?

The fumble bee !