What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

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Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What did the earwig say as it fell down the stairs ?

Ear we go !

Why did Einstein stop seeing his mistress?

She fell in love and he didn't anticipate entanglement

Shelf Jokes More Shelf Jokes

What ghost did Ebenezer Scrooge encounter when he refurnished his home?

The shadow of his former shelf.

Where did the spoiled milk sit?

On the top shelf. Where did the chocolate milk sit In the back.

Blame Jokes More Blame Jokes

What did one earthquake say to the other?

I don't know what your blaming me for, it's your fault!"

Whats George Zimmerman's favorite song?

Blame it on the night

Sean Connery Jokes More Sean Connery Jokes

How does Sean Connery find his way to the toilet?

With a shat nav.

What time does Sean Connery get to the US Open?

Ten-ish

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

What is the difference between a fisherman and a lazy student?

One baits his hook the other hates his book.

How did the potato get back from the party?

It booked a Tuber.

Shout Jokes More Shout Jokes

What do the Dallas Cowboys and the Rev. Billie Graham have in common?

Both can make 70,000 people stand up and shout "JESUS CHRIST!"

What does a Japanese chef shout in bed?

Ooo mami! (Umami)

Cupboard Jokes More Cupboard Jokes

What do you call two lesbians in a cupboard?

A liquor cabinet.

What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food ?

Snakes and Larders !sna