Shelf Jokes

What do you call a short priest reaching for his bible that's on the top shelf?

Christina Ricci.

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What did the bookshelf say when it looked in the mirror?

I can see my shelf"

Why do Little People hate the taste of alcohol?

Because they can't reach the top shelf.

What did Sean Connery say when a book fell on his head?

I have only my shelf to blame"

Why are librarians so lonely?

They're always by them shelves Just wanted to see if that library joke checked out Sorry for all the library jokes, I'll put them on hold

What ghost did Ebenezer Scrooge encounter when he refurnished his home?

The shadow of his former shelf.

What did Sean Connery say when his books fell on his head?

I blame my shelf

What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

Where did the spoiled milk sit?

On the top shelf. Where did the chocolate milk sit In the back.

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Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Who else would've stolen it?

You think a burglar broke in and was like "Cute top!"

What did Katy Perry steal from Dr. Frankenstein's closet?

The Tie of the Igor.

Library Jokes More Library Jokes

How much for a happy ending?

Sir, this is a library!" *whispers* sorry, how much for a happy ending

What aisle has the milk?

Sir, this is a library." *whispers* "What aisle has the milk "

Shout Jokes More Shout Jokes

What's the difference between Here and There?

When you're right the whole room shouts "Here, here!" But when you're wrong one person pats you on the back and says "There, there."

What do Batman's parents shout when dinners ready?

NOTHING, BECAUSE THEY'RE DEAD.

Shadow Jokes More Shadow Jokes

Why are there so many avenues in Belgium?

Because German soldiers like to march in the shadow.

What kind of subreddit dedicates itself to darkness and shadows?

No it is not r/shadow removed

Little People Jokes More Little People Jokes

Why do Little People hate the taste of alcohol?

Because they can't reach the top shelf.

What if Snow White just pretended to be asleep so she didn't have to clean up after little people anymore?

Because that I totally get.

Spoil Milk Jokes More Spoil Milk Jokes

Where did the spoiled milk sit?

On the top shelf. Where did the chocolate milk sit In the back.

What do you get from a pampered cow?

Spoiled milk!

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the last thing a Redneck says before he dies?

Watch this!

What did capital 'O' say to capital 'Q'?

Hey, put that thing back in your trousers!"

Ebenezer Scrooge Jokes More Ebenezer Scrooge Jokes

What does Ebenezer Scrooge serve at his Christmas Party?

Humburgers!

What ghost did Ebenezer Scrooge encounter when he refurnished his home?

The shadow of his former shelf.