What do you call a couch stuffed with chic peas?

a hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it.

Previous Random Joke Next

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Whatever's the matter ?

asked her mother. 'I don't know' replied Mary 'but the teacher thinks I may have caught decimals.'

How do you know your S&amp?

M partner works in IT? They insist your safe word has an upper case letter, a lower case letter, and at least one number.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

How hard do you think Joe Biden laughs when a senate's bill gets 69 votes?

I bet he has to leave the room.

Why did Michael Jackson call Boyz II Men?

Because he thought it was a delivery service.

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

What did the hippy say when he was told to get off the couch and get a job?

Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)

What do you call two couches that are in love with each other?

Homosectionals.

Boyfriend Jokes More Boyfriend Jokes

Why did the wheelchair-bound girlfriend break up with her boyfriend?

He kept pushing her around.

What does Taylor Swift tell her boyfriend when he gets toilet paper stuck on his arse?

Shake it off

Stuff Jokes More Stuff Jokes

What happened when the turkey got into a fight?

He got the stuffing knocked out of him.

How do you know Bernie Sanders got elected?

All your stuff has been donated to charity

Blame Jokes More Blame Jokes

Why are Cal Tech and MIT constantly Fighting?

Because MIT blames Cal Tech for stealing their Feynman, and there will never be another man as Fine.

What did one earthquake say to the other?

I don't know what your blaming me for, it's your fault!"

Chic Pea Jokes More Chic Pea Jokes

What do you call a couch stuffed with chic peas?

a hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it.

What's the difference between a chic pea and a garbanzo bean?

Iv never had a garbanzo bean on my face.