What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why doesn't Jesus enjoy manicures or pedicures?

Because they always try to mess with his nails.

What do these shoes do?

GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame tries new pair And these G: Wait- D: clicks heels turns into hamburger

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Which whiskey should you buy if you want to dance all night?

Wild Twerky!

Why did the rooster buy mittens?

So his chicken fingers wouldn't get cold. I'll leave now

Cent Jokes More Cent Jokes

What makes perfect sense?

The U.S. mint (cents)

Why do people throw coins into foutains?

Why do people throw coins into fountains? I don't know, doesn't make any cents.

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

What does the customer say to the worker as he leaves the store after buying a discounted item?

Good buy.

What does a fish say when he hits concrete?

Dam! A customer told me that joke, equipped with an " old guys rule" shirt and a hardy fist bump.

Candy Bar Jokes More Candy Bar Jokes

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

How does a candy bar laugh?

It snickers

Non Jokes More Non Jokes

What's the best part of an asynchronous dog?

It's non barking! Hopefully some software people get this one

Why do they call it a non-sequitur?

Riot gear.

Clerk Jokes More Clerk Jokes

When I walked to the register with the condoms the clerk asked "Would you like a bag?

I replied "No, she's not that ugly"

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!