Candy Bar Jokes

What's the best part about being an orphan?

All your chips and candy bars are family sized.

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How many NRA members does it take to stop a 6-year-old paraplegic from stealing a candy bar?

Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds.

How does a candy bar laugh?

It snickers

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

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Family Jokes More Family Jokes

What do people and pizza have in common?

If they're black, they can't feed a family.

Which family in Game Of Thrones fell down the stairs?

The Bannisters

Non Jokes More Non Jokes

Why do they call it a non-sequitur?

Riot gear.

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

Snicker Jokes More Snicker Jokes

Why do they print nutritional information on Snickers bars?

If you don't know candy is bad for you, what are the chances you can read

What did Obi-wan say to Skywalker the first time he saw him as Darth Vader?

snickering) Nice suit, must have cost you an ...

Flavor Jokes More Flavor Jokes

What do you call cantaloupe flavored gum?

A: A Ty-lemma (pronounced like dilemma)

What flavor is the milkshake?

How far away is the yard How could you know its better than mine You seem, frankly, a bit overconfident.

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What did the pirate say after he pulled a steering wheel out of his pants?

It's driving me nuts!"

What did the Psychiatrist say to the naked man wrapped in surran wrap?

Well I can clearly see your nuts

Cherry Jokes More Cherry Jokes

What did Mario say to Yoshi when he started climbing the Cherry tree?

X-post r/landscaping) Yoshino!!!

What are the 4 dirtiest streets in Philadelphia?

Turner, Front, Mascher, Cherry

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What happened to the Polish National Library?

A: Someone stole the book.

How do you know if Buzzfeed article is stolen?

You get the feeling that you've Reddit before.

Payday Jokes More Payday Jokes

What's a Mexican's favorite candy bar?

A payday

Why does the letter "r" make all the difference between Friday and Sunday?

payday vs prayday.