What do hand grenades and wives have in common?

Remove the ring and your house is gone.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Where'd you buy my gift?

Me: Bed Bath & Beyond Wife: You used a coupon right Me: Coupon *wife faints*

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

House Jokes More House Jokes

How can you tell if a hippie has been at your house?

He's still there.

How could the dolphin afford to buy a house ?

He prawned everything !

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

How did Kim Kardashian get her hands on Liberace's bath robe?

GrammysRedCarpet

Howdo you stop a baby from running in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

Why don't you remove those barriers to imports?

It will ease my inflation and the benefits will trickle down.

What is Iron Man when he removes his suit?

Stark naked.

Ring Jokes More Ring Jokes

Why did the Hobbit put his phone on silent?

Because he was bored of the rings!

Why don't women propose to men?

Because the guy'd always be disappointed when she took out a ring.

Hand Grenade Jokes More Hand Grenade Jokes

What do you call a baby Muslim?

A hand grenade.

What do you get when you throw a hand grenade into a bathroom in France?

Linoleum Blownapart