What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What did people call Putin after he lost an arm?

Amputin

What happened when the shoe factory burned down?

500 soles were lost.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did Miley Cyrus' dancing instructor tell her to do?

Hometwerk

How do you please all the people?

Tell them Ellen Pao has stepped down as of today!

Control Jokes More Control Jokes

What do capitalists and conspiracy theorists have in common?

They are both controlled by little green men.

How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?

Her food is potion-controlled.

Bach Jokes More Bach Jokes

What did Mozart say to the police clerk?

I'll be Bach" hahaha. What do you mean they're different people

Why did the composer go to the chiropractor?

Because he had Bach problems

Conductor Jokes More Conductor Jokes

What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad?

One trains the mind the other minds the train.

Why did the train get hit by lighting?

Because of the conductor.

Handel Jokes More Handel Jokes

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

What happened when the composer got angry?

He flew off the Handel

Orchestra Jokes More Orchestra Jokes

What do you call a mammoth who conducts an orchestra?

Tuskanini.

Why can't an orchestra made of OB/GYN doctors ever get good enough to perform a concert?

Because the C-section is always messy.