Conductor Jokes

What job do you never stop training for?

Conductor

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What do you call a drummer who has lost one of his drumsticks?

A conductor.

What did the rubber say when he was offered a job as the high school choir teacher?

I can't, I'm not a conductor." Pffffffhehewheheheheheh.

Why are trains so energetic?

They have Conductors.

Which member felt the warmest?

The conductor.

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

Why did the train get hit by lighting?

Because of the conductor.

What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad?

One trains the mind the other minds the train.

Why couldn't they execute the railway worker with the electric chair?

He was too good a conductor

What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert?

He was forced to resort to excessive violins.

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What did the New York Salmon say to the driver?

I'm swimming here!

When I see a "How am I driving?

sticker, I want to take the driver in my arms and tell them that I too have questions about my existence

Bullet Train Jokes More Bullet Train Jokes

Why was the bullet train behind schedule?

Because it had a bad conductor.

Why don't american have a bullet train?

They use the bullets to train the military.

Sentence Jokes More Sentence Jokes

Why did the criminal get released from prison after he wrote a short essay?

He had served his sentence.

Why did the English major break up with the pilot?

Because the pilot kept ending sentences with a preposition, over.

Slack Jokes More Slack Jokes

How do blind skydivers know when to pull the cord?

The leash goes slack

What did the boy say after the tailor made fun of him for not wearing pants?

Hey, why don't you cut me some slacks?

Crime Jokes More Crime Jokes

What do you call a black guy on a bike?

Crime

What do you call a scam artist who uses his vocabulary to commit crimes?

A LexiCon

Bad Conductor Jokes More Bad Conductor Jokes

Why was the bullet train behind schedule?

Because it had a bad conductor.

Why cant train drivers be sentenced to the electric chair?

Because they're bad conductors.

Rubber Jokes More Rubber Jokes

What did the rubber say when he was offered a job as the high school choir teacher?

I can't, I'm not a conductor." Pffffffhehewheheheheheh.

What is, aside from being rubber, the similarity between an old car tire and 365 used condoms?

It was a Good Year...

Engineer Jokes More Engineer Jokes

What kind of ears do trains have?

Engineers (engine ears).

Why do Native Americans have such good hearing?

They have engineers