What happened did someone try to break into your house?

Me: No. My gf said we needed to talk

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

Who is in cowboy films and is always broke?

Skint Eastwood.

What did the basic girl say after all her writing utensils broke?

I literally cant even write now

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What will happen if you went inside a black hole?

I don't know either. It must be out-of-this-world.

What happened when the pig ran into his ex?

there was a porkward silence

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What do you call a fugitive, talking down to you while fleeing down the stairs?

a condescending con descending.

What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker ?

A bird that talks in morse code !

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What did the Illuminati say when they tried to read someone's mind, but failed to do so?

Curses, foiled again!"

Why do carcinogens want to give us cancer so badly?

Because they're trying asbestos they can.

House Jokes More House Jokes

How Do You Start a Flood?

An engineer and an attorney were fishing in the Caribbean. The attorney said, Im here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything. "Thats quite a coincidence," said the engineer. Im here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood and my insurance company also paid for everything. The puzzled attorney asked, How do you start a flood?

Why did Thoreau build a house?

A: Because he wanted to be walled-in.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What does Leia say when she needs help?

I think I could use a Han here.

Why are men like blenders?

You need one but you're not quite sure why.

Gf Jokes More Gf Jokes

Whats a gf?

Mom: if youre a good boy, youll get one when youre older. Son: What is Im not a good boy? Mom: Youll get many.

What do you do if your GF is having siezures in the bathtub?

Throw in your laundry.