What is the difference between a magician and Bernie Sanders?

The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter?

Twitter only allows 160 characters

What's the difference between Pizza and your opinion?

I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes

End Jokes More End Jokes

Why do gas prices end with 9/10 of a penny?

It just makes cents.

Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce?

Well, I'm guessing it's because the other fifty percent can't afford lawyers.

Magician Jokes More Magician Jokes

What do you call a dog that is also a magician?

A Labracadabrador.

What's the difference between a magician and a psychologist?

A magician makes rabbits appear in hats, while a psychologist makes habits appear in rats.

Return Jokes More Return Jokes

Why did the cows keep returning to the field of marijuana?

It was the pot calling the cattle back.

How long are you supposed to wait to return a boy's call?

This IRS guy sounded pretty into me

Bernie Sanders Jokes More Bernie Sanders Jokes

Which is Bernie Sanders' dominant hand?

His left one

Why did Bernie Sanders's chicken restaurant throw out so much food?

He only sold left wings.

Wallet Jokes More Wallet Jokes

Why do wallets make so much noise?

Because money talks.

What do you get when you fart on your wallet?

Gas money

Performance Jokes More Performance Jokes

Why do galaxies put on boring shows while separated?

Because their performance is lack-cluster.

What is the difference between a magician and Bernie Sanders?

The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance