What's the difference between a Surrey girl and a washing machine?

When you drop a load in a washing machine it doesn't text you every hour for a week.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between an Alto and a Tenor?

The Tenor doesn't have hair on his back.

What's the difference between someone falling from 21st floor and 1st floor?

21st floor person goes: AHHHHHHHHHH 1st floor goes: AHHHHHHHHHH

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What do you get when you drop an egg off the Empire State Building?

New Yolk

Why wasn't the pediatrician impressed with the new year's eve Times Square ball drop?

Because he has seen plenty of balls drop. (Sorry)

Hour Jokes More Hour Jokes

What is red and green, and goes over 3000 miles per hour?

A frog in the blender

How long does it take a tweaker to go shopping?

An hour 5 minutes for the Ramen noodles and foil. 55 minutes to fix the squeaky shopping cart wheel.

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

What is the capital of the United States?

Half of what it was last week

What do you call a hispanic man with a rubber toe?

ROBERTO! I'm here all week.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What should you do if you see an epileptic having a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of laundry, and soap

Whats the difference between a washing machine and a woman?

A washing machine doesn't follow you around after you dump a load in it.

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

What method did SFML perform when the Human lost to the AI?

Text.GetRect()

How do you troll someone?

Make them wipe their screen because they think text is a smudge.

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

Why is the washing machine so grumpy?

It keeps getting agitated

What's yellow and goes around?

A banana in the washing machine.

Surrey Jokes More Surrey Jokes

Where's the best place to apologise to someone?

Surrey.

What river separates China and India?

Answer: the Fraser River (which separates Richmond and Surrey)