What's the difference between the 2016 presidential debates and a pen of baboons relentlessly fighting over the dead stinking corpse of a sheep?

Microphones!

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between my bike and your mom?

Your dad doesn't watch when I ride my bike.

What's the difference between a white guy and a pizza?

A pizza doesn't shoot up a school.

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

Who fought in the Civil War?

Millennial student: Captain America and Iron Man. T: ....

Why do you fight using only your feet?

Oh, y'know. For kicks.

2016 Jokes More 2016 Jokes

What's the best way to wrap up 2016?

Debbie Reynolds Wrap.

Where's the best place to go if you want a little head?

The 2016 Olympics.

Stink Jokes More Stink Jokes

What's green, fuzzy, and stinks of pork?

Kermit the frog's finger

What did one smell say to the odor?

You stink at telling jokes."

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangaroo?

A wooly jumper!

What do you call it when a sheep sells his wool for money?

Cashearing! (Joke I made up last night at work, so be gentle with me)

Pen Jokes More Pen Jokes

How do you know your waitress is having a rough night?

She's got a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pen.

Why did the pig have ink all over his face?

Because it came out of the pen.

Baboon Jokes More Baboon Jokes

How does a baboon make phone calls?

He just monkeys around on the line!

Whats the difference between congress and parliament?

Ones filled with a bunch of baboons and the other just doesn't give a hoot during the day.

Microphone Jokes More Microphone Jokes

What's your answer?

whispers into microphone* Please help me, I don't even know these people

What is your line of business?

Me mumbling: Treason stuff. Cop: Louder for the microphone. Me: Trees 'n' stuff. Gardening.