What's the difference between the 2016 presidential debates and a pen of baboons relentlessly fighting over the dead stinking corpse of a sheep?

Microphones!

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between a Christian and a Muslim?

One blows up kids, the other gets blown by them.

What's the difference between a very old shaggy Yeti and a dead bee?

One's a seedy beast and the other's a deceased bee.

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

Why didn't the Avatar want to fight the Fire Nation?

Because they gave him Aang-xiety

What is the first rule of Womans fight club?

Never tell anyone what are you so mad about

2016 Jokes More 2016 Jokes

Where's the best place to go if you want a little head?

The 2016 Olympics.

What did Matthew McConaughey have to say about the 2016 Oscar-winner's line-up?

All white, all white, all white!

Stink Jokes More Stink Jokes

What's the difference between the 2016 presidential debates and a pen of baboons relentlessly fighting over the dead stinking corpse of a sheep?

Microphones!

Why do women wear makeup and perfume?

Because they are ugly and they stink.

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Why did the sheep move house?

The neighbours were baaastsrds.

How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.

Pen Jokes More Pen Jokes

Why did the farmer name his pig Ink?

Because he kept running out of the pen.

How do you know your waitress is having a rough night?

She's got a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pen.

Baboon Jokes More Baboon Jokes

What's the difference between the 2016 presidential debates and a pen of baboons relentlessly fighting over the dead stinking corpse of a sheep?

Microphones!

What's the difference between a group of baboons and our political system?

I don't know.

Microphone Jokes More Microphone Jokes

What did the oyster say to the fish who stole it's shell?

Stop being shellfish!" *drops microphone, walks away*

What is your line of business?

Me mumbling: Treason stuff. Cop: Louder for the microphone. Me: Trees 'n' stuff. Gardening.