Whats the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of an abortion clinic?

Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger

This joke may have profanity.

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Where can a hand refuel its car?

At a fist pump.

What kind of car does a ghost drive?

A boogati!

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Whats the difference between Caesar and Casanova?

Caesar said:"I came, I saw, I conquered." Casanova said:"I saw, I conquered, I came."

Whats the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

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How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce unionized.

When she got in front of the judge he asked, "first offender?

She replied, "No. First a Gibson, second a Fender."

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What did the man say after Michael Jackson stole his coat?

Hey that's mycoat Jackson!

What should you do if your walls get cold?

Put on another coat.

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What's the worst part about /r/meirl moderators?

Deleted

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Ford was my best friend.

Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

Why did the black man walk into a bar?

Because the cell door was still locked.

What does getting pregnant and locking your car keys in your car have in common?

They can both be fixed with a coat hanger.

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

What's the the key to telling an ISIS joke?

The execution.

Why was the band late to their gig?

Because the drummer locked himself in the car with the keys.

Abortion Clinic Jokes More Abortion Clinic Jokes