Where are you and Mom going tonight?

Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.

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Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What did the baby say to its mom after breastfeeding?

Thanks for the mammaries!

Why gypsies boys let their mustache to grow?

To look more like their mom.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What did you do at preschool?

3-year-old: We had to color inside the lines the WHOLE time. Me: 3-year-old: I need to lie down.

What do you call the kids claiming "We don't need no education"?

Comfortably Dumb

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Why didn't the rock make it to work today?

He was stoned

What would George Washington do if he was alive today?

Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What did the cannibal make of the politician he just met?

Pork and bologne sammiches.

Why is the founder of Comcast going to purgatory?

He met St. Peter at the pearly gates and St. Peter said was, "Please hold. Your soul is very important to us."

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

What happened when the teacher fell in the copier?

A: She was beside herself.

Why did the teacher have her hair in a bun?

Because she had her nose in a hamburger.

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

Who's there ! Caitlin ! Caitlin who ?

Caitlin you my trainers tonight I'm wearing them !

What did the grave robber say to his gym buddy in the locker room?

I'm gonna get some head tonight.