Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.
Thanks for the mammaries!
To look more like their mom.
3-year-old: We had to color inside the lines the WHOLE time. Me: 3-year-old: I need to lie down.
Comfortably Dumb
He was stoned
Probably get suffocated in his collapsed coffin
Pork and bologne sammiches.
He met St. Peter at the pearly gates and St. Peter said was, "Please hold. Your soul is very important to us."
A: She was beside herself.
Because she had her nose in a hamburger.
Caitlin you my trainers tonight I'm wearing them !
I'm gonna get some head tonight.