Who gets the job of writing the fortunes in the cookies?

I want that job. I could really screw with some people.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Who is it?

Police: Police. Me:What do u want Police: To talk. Me: How many r u Police: 2 Me: Talk to each other.

What did the Pilipino orphan boy say to the linguist who wanted to adopt him?

I'll tagalog!

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many reddit offices does it take to screw you in a light bulb?

yishan

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One.

People Jokes More People Jokes

How do you make people lose faith in this sub?

This.

How does Harry Houdini tell people to steal stuff?

Straight jack it.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What song do burgers sing on the job?

Gristle While You Work!

Why was the powerlifter fired from his job at the restaurant?

He was awesome at cleaning the bar, but he wouldn't stop jerking it.

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

How can you tell if it was a shared computer used by many staffers?

A: There is writing on the White-out.

What did one potatoe say to another?

Dan Quayle wrote this joke.

Fortune Jokes More Fortune Jokes

What costs you a fortune and leaves you in tears a year and a half later?

Not cancer, but my relationship that just ended today!

Which burgers can tell your fortune?

Medium burgers!

Cookie Jokes More Cookie Jokes

Why'd the cookie go to the hospital?

It was feeling a little crumby.

Why did the feminist get fired from Panera?

Because she ate all the cookies and didn't know how to make a sandwich.