Why did the meteorologist bring a bar of soap to work?

He was expecting showers.

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Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why are there no Puerto Rican's in Star Trek?

They won't work in the future either.

How many servers does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, it's not my side work.

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

What did the short boy bring to high school?

A ladder.

Why did Snoop Dogg bring an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

Why did the lady at the bar slap the man next to her for stroking his mustache?

Because in between stroking it, he said "hello, let me clear you off a place to sit."

How does an international banker have a good Friday night?

He goes to a bar and slips somebody a Rupee, then gives them a Franc and some Deutsche Marks.

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

What is the best part about showering with a 14 year old girl?

If you slick her hair back just right, she looks nine!

What are you gonna do today?

Me: Shower. W: ...what else M: Make a new iTunes playlist. W: Wow. M: Might not have time for a shower.

Soap Jokes More Soap Jokes

How do you make the hippie run out of money?

You hide daddies credit card under a bar of soap.

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

Expect Jokes More Expect Jokes

Why did the Addams have the late man arrested?

He was expected on Tuesday, but he came on Wednesday.

Who remembers the 2016 presidential race?

Nobody expected that late run from Gonzalez, did they?

Meteorologist Jokes More Meteorologist Jokes

Where did the meteorologist stop for a drink on the way home from a long day in the studio?

The nearest ISOBAR!!

Why did the meteorologist bring a bar of soap to work?

He was expecting showers.