What did the physicist say to the two women he was trying to pick up at the bar?

Do you ladies wanna go back to my place and conduct a double slit experiment?"

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Which wiki do dyslexic pastry chefs claim to be trying to visit before getting arrested?

www.filopedia.org

Why have you got cotton wool in your ears do you have an infection ?

Pupil: Well you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other so I am trying to keep them it all in!

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why do Spanish beaches have a lot of women?

Cos they're playas.

What is the difference between a boat and a woman?

The boat cuts through the water, a woman waters through the cut.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

Where does a guy from Arkansas go to pick up girls?

Family reunions.

Which one is yours?

Say, "I haven't picked one out yet!" It's worth it.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

What do you get when you stab a baby with a knife?

An erection and a place to put it.

Why does Daenerys take so long to get places?

She keeps her feet.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What does the man say when he walks into the bar?

Can I please get a drink "

What professional hates going to the bar?

A lawyer

Physicist Jokes More Physicist Jokes

What is the difference between a physicist and a biologist?

A physicist is atoms studying themselves, while a biologist is cells that study themselves.

Why is the physicist not worried about his weight?

Because m = AIt

Lady Jokes More Lady Jokes

When do you kick a dwarf in the balls?

When he is standing next to your lady saying her hair smells nice.

Who was that at the door?

Veronica: A lady with a baby in a buggy. Mrs Brown: Tell her to push off. "

Conduct Jokes More Conduct Jokes

What was the musician doing when he was struck by lightning?

He was conducting.

What do you call a mammoth who conducts an orchestra?

Tuskanini.