What did the physicist say to the two women he was trying to pick up at the bar?

Do you ladies wanna go back to my place and conduct a double slit experiment?"

Previous Random Joke Next
Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?

Hey guys, why don't we try one of my songs "

What were you doing?

flashback to me trying to find the actual Hogwarts* "Grad school."

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you call a woman who is paralyzed from the waist down?

Wife.

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

How many Man U. fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to change the lightbulb and one to drive down to Kent to pick him/her up.

Who is the richest person in the Bible?

The Pharao's daughter. She went to the bank of the Nile to pick up a little prophet.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

What did one plane said to the other plane?

Can I crash at your place

Whatcha doing?

Me: "Going on twitter to hang out." H: "Twitter is an app, not a place." Me: *whispers venomously* "Is too a place!!"

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What do you call a mushroom that goes into a bar and buys everyone a drink?

The fun guy

What's worse than a Redditor walking into a bar?

The Holocaust.

Physicist Jokes More Physicist Jokes

What fundamental force compels physicists to go to work on Mondays?

The week force.

Why do Physicists make terrible parents?

They think their children are small enough to neglect! Adapted from a Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, I forget which one.

Lady Jokes More Lady Jokes

Why did the lady tell her doctor she had breast cancer?

Because she wanted to get it off her chest.

What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market?

Good morning, ladies!"

Conduct Jokes More Conduct Jokes

How do u know if a company that just hired you conducts drug tests?

What is the likelihood it will be a hairtest

How does Ohm conduct an orchestra?

Standing on his head!