Soap Jokes

What the difference between a nun in a bathtub & a nurse in the bathtub?

One has soul full of hope & one has a hole full of soap... I'll walk myself out, sorry first post here

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What's the difference between a Nun and a lady taking a bath?

The Nun has hope in her soul and the lady taking a bath has soap in her hole.

How do you make the hippie run out of money?

You hide daddies credit card under a bar of soap.

What is the difference between a girl in a church, and a girl in a bathtub?

The girl in the church has hope in her soul, and the girl In the bathtub has soap in her hole.

What's the difference between a girl that's praying and a girl that's having a bubble bath?

One has hope in her soul, The other has soap in her hole.

What's an alcoholic's favorite type of soap?

Bar soap.

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight. :D

Where's the best place to hide money from a Mexican?

Under a bar of soap.

Where is the best place to hide a hippie's weed?

Under the soap.

What happened to the boy-band member who dropped the soap In the prison shower?

Let's just say that his backstreet went more than one direction.

Why did the meteorologist bring a bar of soap to work?

He was expecting showers.

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How do you hide money from a hippie?

Put it under the soap.

What's the difference between a praying nun and a girl taking a bath?

One has hope in her soul and the other has soap in her hole

Whats the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the bathtub?

One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole.

What should you do if you see an epileptic having a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of laundry, and soap

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

What kind of soap do Middle Eastern citizens use?

Arab spring

Where's the safest place to hide money from a man?

Under the soap

What's the difference between a nun on her knees and a nun in the bath?

One has hope in their soul, the other has soap in their hole

Why did the little pig hide the soap?

He heard the farmer yell "Hogwash!"

How did Mummy know you hadn't had a bath?

Eve: I forgot to dirty the towel wet the soap and flood the bathroom.

What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub?

Answer: One has hope in her soul the other has soap in her hole.

How did your mom know you hadn't washed your face?

I forgot to wet the soap.

What's the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the bathtub?

The woman in church has hope in her soul... The woman In the bathtub has soap in her hole.

What's the difference between a nun and a woman taking a bath?

The nun has hope in her soul, and the woman has soap in her hole. EDIT: NSFW

This joke may have profanity.

Why should you never trust soap?

It's an emulsive lyer.

Who steals all the soap in the bathroom?

The robber ducky

What kind of soap do you use to clean a dirty joke?

Bawdy wash.

Which birds steal soap from the bath ?

Robber ducks !

Where's the soap?

Yes, it does." she replies.

Which villains steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks.

How do you get a Polak out of the bath tub?

A: Throw in a bar of soap.

How do you launder money?

Put it under the soap.

Why in the hell would I clean my bathtub?

I put soap and water in there every day...

Where do you hide a hippie's weed?

Under the soap.

What did the soap say to the hands as they were being washed?

I think we're in sink."

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Sailor Jokes More Sailor Jokes

Why do sailors use liquid soap?

It takes longer to pick up when they drop it.

What is it called when a Sailor in the Navy gets a care package from home?

Underwear Replenishment

Nun Jokes More Nun Jokes

What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?

The nun has hope in her soul!

What do they do when the Queen has a baby?

Fire a 21 gun salute. What do they do when a nun has a baby Fire the dirty old Canon.

Pope Jokes More Pope Jokes

What happens when a pope dies?

Another pops up.

What is the Popes favorite trick to do on a bike?

Papa-wheelie!

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

Why did the Eagle go to store to buy some Rogaine?

To cover up his bald spot.

Why did the hotel refuse hospitality to the Navy?

They didn't want their rooms covered with seamen.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How did the pirate fix the hole in his pants?

He used an eyepatch

What happens when the president of the United States has to use the bathroom?

The state of alert in the White House rises to Defecate 2.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why couldn't the blonde manage to make Ice-Cubes?

A: She couldn't find the recipe.

How Many Running Backs Does It Take To Turn On A Light?

Two. One to find the switch...the other to hit it.

Pray Jokes More Pray Jokes

Where do salt lovers go to pray?

OC The taberNaCl. (Sorry..) (X-posted to dad jokes.)

What's the difference between a praying nun and a girl taking a bath?

One has hope in her soul and the other has soap in her hole

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

Where'd I drop my waffle?

At the beach in San Diego.

Why did the dog keep dropping his ball?

He had barkinsons disease.