Why does a Belgian take a stone and a flashlight to bed?

The stone to throw the lights out, the flashlight to check if the lights are really out

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What did Mick Jagger say when he walked in on Hugh Hefner in bed with Dennis Weaver?

He said "Hey Hey Hugh Hugh Get Off Of McCould"

How do you get a black man to stop jumping on the bed?

Put velcro on the ceiling.

Light Jokes More Light Jokes

What lights up a football stadium ?

A football match !

What's the Primary Directive in a nunnery (convent) ?

Lights out at nine, candles out at ten ...

Check Jokes More Check Jokes

How can you tell if a carpenter is happy?

Check his spirit level.

Why is it so confusing to play chess with the British?

It's only check, mate

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

Why do baseball pitches make bad doctors?

Because when asked to 'give it to them straight', they throw a curveball!

What do you get when you cross the Italian mafia with the Russian mafia?

Thrown in a lake.

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

Why didn't the rock make it to work today?

He was stoned

Who's there A gorgon. A gorgon who?

420 gaze it. Geddit. Because then you'd be stoned Okay, sorry I'll leave.

Belgian Jokes More Belgian Jokes

How can you tell a Belgian in a submarine?

He's the one with a parachute on his back.

Why does a Belgian have a knife in his car?

To cut the corners!

Flashlight Jokes More Flashlight Jokes

Why does a Belgian take a stone and a flashlight to bed?

The stone to throw the lights out, the flashlight to check if the lights are really out

How did the dog feel when he lost his flashlight?

Delighted.