Aboot Jokes

Why do Canadians say aboot?

Because there is too much snow to wear shoes.

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What's a Canadian's favorite footwear?

Aboot

How did the bad Canadian fisherman describe his only catch of the day?

Aboot this big"

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What did the janitor say when he came out of the closet?

SUPPLIES!

What do you call an armoire that is secretly used as a closet?

A closet closet.

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What do you tell a person with two swollen eyes ?

Nothing, you already told 'em twice.

Why are you telling me this now?

Vader: Luke: Vader: I need a kidney.

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Why couldn't the whistleblower pick up his dry-cleaning?

Because he was Snowden! (Snowed in)

Why couldn't the NSA whistleblower leave Russia?

He was snowed in.

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Why are clothes so expensive?

I shouldn't have to pay so much to not be naked. Other people should pay me not to be naked.

How will you be paying, sir?

Check mate"..

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Why do Canadians not pay attention to their local wildlife?

Because there's nothing to care-aboot. (caribou)

What's the difference between a reindeer and a caribou?

Caribou can't fly.

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How do you get a person with podophobia to leave?

Just say "shoe".

Why cant Gingers make shoes?

They wouldn't have a sole.

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What did the Asian guy say when he was caught sleeping with another man's wife?

Me love you wrong time.

Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who?

Daisy me rollin. They hatin. Patrollin and tryna catch me ridin dirty.

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How do you tell the difference from a guy's chromosome and a girl's chromosome?

You pull down their gene's and have a look! Credit: I heard this from an older gentlemen today at a senior home.

What do you call an elephant with a carrot in each ear ?

Anything you want as he can't hear you !