Absolutely Sense Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

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How many of my fellow Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one of course, as we are highly efficient and have absolutely no sense of humour.

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German Jokes More German Jokes

What do you say when German secret police is bugging you?

geSTAHPo!

What's a german's favourite number?

Nein

Bleed Jokes More Bleed Jokes

Why did the clueless shark keep swimming in circles?

A : It had a bleed on its tail fin.

What has got two legs and bleeds?

Half a dog!

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape so Christians can't claim God did it.

How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A Brazilian

Humor Jokes More Humor Jokes

What form of humor do Dentists find most offensive?

Plaqueface

What do you call cows that don't have a sense of humor?

Feminists.

Paper Cut Jokes More Paper Cut Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts?

Neosporin.

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

What is the only bent straight line?

Its one direction of course.

Which horse runs the city?

The mare, of course

Humour Jokes More Humour Jokes

What's an actuary?

An accountant without the sense of humour.

Where would we be in the world without humour?

Germany.

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Ukrainians does it take to screw a lightbulb?

You don't need to, they glow in the dark.

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, because they charge you $500 for the iLightbulb.