Absolutely Sense Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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How many of my fellow Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one of course, as we are highly efficient and have absolutely no sense of humour.

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Paper Cut Jokes More Paper Cut Jokes

What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts?

Neosporin.

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

German Jokes More German Jokes

What's worse than being German on D-Day?

Being single on V-Day.

What does the beginning of the German alphabet start with?

Not Z.

Humour Jokes More Humour Jokes

What's the difference between an American and a Canadian?

A: An Canadian not only has a sense of humour but can also spell it.

How many of my fellow Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one of course, as we are highly efficient and have absolutely no sense of humour.

Bleed Jokes More Bleed Jokes

How do you know when a liberal is really dead?

A: His heart stops bleeding.

What is puberty?

B- Do you bleed BD - ... B - You Will

Course Jokes More Course Jokes

What's the instinctual response to a bad gym selfie?

A reflex of course.

Which horse runs the city?

The mare, of course

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many US Congressmen does it take to change a lightbulb?

Oh, please. Like they've ever changed anything that needed it.

How many acrobats does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change it and one to yell "Ta-daa!" when he's done.

Humor Jokes More Humor Jokes

What's a Jackhammer's Best Friend?

Cast Steel! Bahahahahah! You know! Cause it has a poor dampening value it vibrates so much! They um. They both vibrate. Well ok. One vibrates, the other reciprocates. That's kinda... Hehe. Heh. Reciprocate my humor damn it!

How can you tell if you have a mature or an immature sense of humor?

poop.

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many teenage girls does it take to screw..... in a lightbulb?

Just one to hold it up as the whole world revolves around her.

How many performance artists does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't know, I left early.