Burst Jokes

Who's there? Dave. Dave who?

Dave promptly burst into tears as not everyone in the world knew Dave.

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What's the difference between a ginger girl and a vampire?

One bursts into flames in the sunlight, and the other is a vampire.

What's the difference between a baby and baby Alien?

One bursts into tears. The other bursts out of tears

What did Moses say when Isaiah told him the levy had burst?

God Dam It!

Why "Trojan" condoms?

Didn't the Trojan horse burst open & thousands of little guys poured out Less than stellar marketing.

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Thousand Jokes More Thousand Jokes

What do you call a man under a pile of leaves?

Russell. What do you call a man under a pile of leaves for thousands of years Pete.

How many times do I have to tell you this Mom?

I have thousands of fans who need to know my thoughts. So, no I can't take out the garbage.

God Dam Jokes More God Dam Jokes

What do beavers do to a river?

God dam it

Where does a divine beaver live?

A God Dam!

Little Guy Jokes More Little Guy Jokes

Why are sloths one of the 7 deadly sins?

Those little guys don't hurt anybody. They just chill all day.

Why "Trojan" condoms?

Didn't the Trojan horse burst open & thousands of little guys poured out Less than stellar marketing.

Tear Jokes More Tear Jokes

What's one thing the Hulk would struggle tearing down?

The fourth wall

What do you call a ghost in a torn sheet?

A holy terror.

Moses Jokes More Moses Jokes

What's Mohammed, Moses and Noah's favourite dessert?

Propheteroles

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it. I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between matter and a hormone?

You can't make matter.

What's the difference between watts and ohms?

Watts are a unit of electrical energy. Ohms are where British people live.

Flame Jokes More Flame Jokes

Why is Paul Walker and Rihannas new song the same?

They both went up in flames.

What would you have if your car's motor was in flames?

A fire engine.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if a dictionary has been working out?

You can see the definition.

How can you tell that the toothbrush was invented in Kentucky?

Because it is not called a teethbrush.