Capitalist Jokes

What do capitalists and conspiracy theorists have in common?

They are both controlled by little green men.

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What do you get when you mix a communist and a capitalist?

Bernie sanders

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Conspiracy Theorist Jokes More Conspiracy Theorist Jokes

Where do conspiracy theorists keep their ideas?

In a skeptic tank. (Note: I just made up this joke earlier today. I'm not 100% sure the joke is obvious feel free to suggest a better wording!)

Why didn't the conspiracy theorist make his irreverently named pet sleep outside?

Because 9/11 was an inside dog.

Folder Jokes More Folder Jokes

Where's that?

Hawaii Where's that -Jamaica Daddy where was I -You weren't born Why's the folder called 'Good Ole Days'

What folder do emails from histrionic venture capitalists go in?

deleted

Ussr Jokes More Ussr Jokes

What did Gorbachev say when the USSR collapsed?

So ve it."

What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to?

Barbers.

Communist Jokes More Communist Jokes

What do you call a communist who's good with a rifle?

A marxman.

Why aren't there any British Communists?

Because communists believe all proper tea is theft.

Bernie Sanders Jokes More Bernie Sanders Jokes

Why does Bernie Sanders write in lowercase letters?

Because he hates capitalism.

Why isn't Bernie Sanders campaigning in OKC?

They're both eliminated and finished second in their conference.

Control Jokes More Control Jokes

What's the difference between In-n-Out Burger french fries and League of Legends?

I can control my salt intake at In-n-out.

Why did the T.V. break up with the remote?

She thought he was too controlling.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

Apparently not 8

How many sociologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.

Mix Jokes More Mix Jokes

What do you call a pony mixed with a robot?

RoboClop....so sorry

What do you call a mix between holiday poultry and a ghoul?

A gobblin. I'll see myself out...