Favor Jokes

What did the large furry mammal say when the salamander who kept asking for favors went too far?

I can't bear it! You axolotl of me this time!

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How can working with cow hide act in your favor on a first date?

As if she's going to lay there and be swayed by some new buck.

Why do Republicans favor small government?

To bitter fit in my uterus.

What did Jennifer Lawrence say to Julius Caesar?

May the Ides be ever in your favor."

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Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What did the girl sea say when the boy sea asked her for a date?

Shore.

Why couldn't the traffic light get a date?

She was wearing no turn on red. :

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?

DAM! (airplane stewardess told me and had me on ground laughing)

What did the Pelican say to the fish when he was running late for work?

I'll catch you later!

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What do you call fireworks that don't work?

Fireunemployed.

How many people work in the Lada factory?

Two. One to cut and one to glue

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What State do you go to to ask questions?

Al-ask-ya

What did the atheist fisherman say when asked about his catch?

There is no cod

Uterus Jokes More Uterus Jokes

What is a woman ?

Man with a uterus somewhere

How's my baby girl?

Me: I'm moving back in. Mom: Your room is ready. Me: No, your uterus! Mom: Steph you drink too much

Small Government Jokes More Small Government Jokes

Why don't all Libertarian candidates have dwarfism?

I thought Libertarians believed in small government.

Why do Republicans favor small government?

To bitter fit in my uterus.

Squid Pro Quo Jokes More Squid Pro Quo Jokes

Whats it called when you give a dolphin food for it to do a trick?

Squid Pro Quo

What do you call a fish that's good at trading favors?

A squid pro quo.

Sway Jokes More Sway Jokes

What do you do when your mother-in-law is swaying towards you?

You pull the trigger again.

How can working with cow hide help on a first date?

As if she's going to lay there and be swayed by some new buck.