Jeremy Clarkson Jokes

What was Jeremy Clarkson on during Top Gear?

SPEEEED!

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What does Jeremy Clarkson and Amy Winehouse have in common?

They both used to be on top gear.

What do Whitney Houston and Jeremy Clarkson have in common?

They were both on Top Gear.

Why were Jeremy Clarkson's colleagues excited to try his mulled wine?

Because they'd been floored by his punch.

What do you get when you minus Jeremy Clarkson from Top Gear...?

A smile !

What is Jeremy Clarkson's PIN number?

Nought two sixty.

What does Jeremy Clarkson have in common with Amy Winehouse?

He can't do 'top gear' anymore!

What do Amy Winehouse and Jeremy Clarkson have in common?

They were both on top gear.

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Gear Jokes More Gear Jokes

What do you get when you minus Jeremy Clarkson from Top Gear...?

A smile !

What does Jeremy Clarkson and Amy Winehouse have in common?

They both used to be on top gear.

Pin Jokes More Pin Jokes

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back

How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?

Depends on what tune the Devil happens to be playing. Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat ?

He had to get a new goat !

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

Floor Jokes More Floor Jokes

What did the floor say to the desk?

I can see your drawers!

What Is A Kiss?

Answer: Its An Inquiry At The Top Floor Regarding The Vacancy In The Ground Floor.

Whitney Houston Jokes More Whitney Houston Jokes

What is Whitney Houston's favorite kind of coordination?

Hand EYEEEEEIIIEEE.....

What is Whitney Houston's best kind of coordination?

Hand EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEE

Punch Jokes More Punch Jokes

What kind of punch hurts the most?

A Sandy Hook.

How do you break a Pollock's finger?

Punch him in the nose.

Amy Winehouse Jokes More Amy Winehouse Jokes

What did Amy Winehouse have in common with the Ghostbusters?

They both downed spirits.

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse, Janice Joplin, Jim Morrison, and a bottle of scotch?

OC) A bottle of scotch can keep beyond 27 years.

Smile Jokes More Smile Jokes

What are you doing, creep?

she says. He glances up, smiles, and says "Calm down. I'm just trying to get a Pikachu."

How do you compliment a girl with a cold sore?

You tell her that her smile is contagious.